


Boss Has A Bad Time In Mementos

by Chesture



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Akechi is not present because no one likes him, Gen, Local coffee dad freaks out, Sojiro is very confused
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-07
Updated: 2017-11-13
Packaged: 2019-01-30 19:42:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12660126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chesture/pseuds/Chesture
Summary: Akira and Futaba convince Sojiro into going with the group on a trip into Mementos. Sojiro agrees, blissfully unaware that he is much too old for what he has just gotten himself into.





	1. Enter

_Some day near the end of October_

"So...Sojiro," Akira began. It was late at night, and the boy was helping him close up shop.

Sojiro raised an eyebrow as he wiped the counter down. "Hm?"

"Futaba and I have been wondering...Do you think you might want to might want to come with us one day on some of our official Phantom Thief business?"

Sojiro stopped and stood up straight, not sure how to respond. "...Why would I want to do that?"

Akira shrugged. "We just thought you might be curious as to what it is we actually do. Especially since it's related to Wakaba's research."

"Hm." Sojiro hadn't really thought about that. He had been so busy coming to terms with the fact that the kids were Phantom Thieves that he hadn't stopped to consider what that actually entailed. "You know what...Sure. Why not."

Akira nodded, apparently satisfied, and they finished closing up shop in silence.

* * *

_Early November_

"Ready?" Futaba asked. Sojiro nodded. Akira touched a button on his phone, and suddenly, the world began to distort. It first became a purple haze, save for the Phantom Thieves, and then red waves began to wash over everything. When the strange phenomena cleared, the world was completely different.

Sojiro looked around in shock. What had been Shibuya just a few moments before was now a surreal rendition of it, devoid of human beings and covered in chains, as well as odd, vein-like tendrils. The sky was a flat crimson, the sun and clouds completely absent. "What...what is this place?" He then caught sight of Akira, Futaba, and their entourage, now in their full Phantom Thief attire. "A-And what happened to your _clothes?_ "

"This - is Mementos," Futaba said, as if that explained everything.

"Mementos?" Sojiro echoed, making it clear that that most definitely did not explain anything.

"This place is the collective cognition of all of mankind," Morgana explained. "It's like...how humanity sees the world." Sojiro turned to look at the now anthropomorphic and very cartoonish cat.

"Is that...Morgana?" he asked, bewildered. The cat nodded in response.

"This is what I look like normally," he said. "I turn into a cat whenever I leave the Metaverse."

"So you're...actually sapient. You think like a human."

"Yes."

Sojiro stared for a moment and then shook his head. "And to think I thought you were just a normal cat this entire time..."

"It's cool," Morgana said, smiling. "Everyone else besides these guys thinks I'm just a cat too, so it's not like I'm not used to it."

Sojiro took a moment to collect his thoughts and look around. "So...the collective human unconscious, huh? ...It looks a lot more unsettling then I would have imagined." Everyone nodded in agreement.

"It's even creepier the further you go in," Ann commented, shivering. "Way creepier."

Sojiro turned his attention back to the Phantom Thieves. "So, back to the clothes thing real quick. What's up with..." He gestured at the group as a whole. "That."

"While in the Metaverse, those with abilities like ours take the appearance of their personal image of a rebel," Yusuke explained. "It has something to do with being viewed as a threat by the ruler of the Palace."

"A rebel, huh...I gotta hand it to you, your outfits are interesting, to say the least."

"We don't get to decide on them," Ann said, displeasure in her tone. "Unfortunately..."

"Unfortunate for you, maybe," Ryuji corrected, grinning. "Mine kicks ass."

Sojiro _hmm_ ed at that and moved on. "So, where are we going?"

"Into the subway system," Akira answered. "That's where the main part of Mementos lies." The Phantom Thieves proceeded to entrance of Mementos itself with Sojiro in tow, and Sojiro looked at the tracks in front of them skeptically.

"Is it safe to walk around down there?" he asked.

"Oh, yeah, it's totally fine," Ryuji said. "No trains ever go on these tracks. The place is big as hell though, so we don't walk."

"How do you get around, then?"

Morgana got _that glint_ in his eye and he grinned. "I thought you'd never ask!" He crouched and leapt into the air, and when he came back down he was a van.

"What the hell?!" Sojiro's eyes went wide at the sight, and he nearly fell over backwards.

"Mona, you really should have given him some warning," Akira chastised. "Cats turning into vans is _not_ as common a cognition as you make it out to be."

Sojiro remained speechless for a few moments as everyone began to pile into the cat van. Futaba had to grab him by the arm and pull him towards it. "Now just hold on a minute," Sojiro protested. "The cat can _turn into a van?_ "

"Mhm!" Futaba answered nonchalantly. "Usually only in Mementos though. He's our primary mode of transportation here." After much urging, Sojiro squeezed into the back of the Monavan, next to Futaba. Upon seeing Akira in the driver's seat, he did a double take.

"You can drive?"

"I can drive well enough for this place," Akira answered, turning the key in the ignition.

"I'm not sure I like the sound of that," Sojiro muttered.

"Don't worry, it's fine!" Futaba reassured him. "Joker's a great driver. We haven't crashed once!"

"Joker?" Sojiro asked, looking bemused.

"Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you! We have codenames." She began pointing to the other Phantom Thieves and listing them off. "He's Joker, she's Queen, he's Skull, she's Panther, he's Fox, she's Noir, and I'm Oracle." She patted the seat of the van. "And he's Mona."

"Why do you need codenames?"

"Ask Mona," Akira called back. "I don't really see the point most of the time but he insists."

"I think they're pretty sweet," Ryuji said.

"Guys, we've been over this before," Morgana chided, his voice reverberating through the walls and seats. "Names have power in the Metaverse."

"You always say that, but you never explain what that actually means," Akira told him.

"It's- it's just not a good idea to use our real names here, okay?" Morgana huffed.

"Do I need a codename, then?" Sojiro asked, curiously.

"Mmmm...you shouldn't _need_ one, but it's probably a good idea to use one just in case."

"How about Boss?" Akira offered.

"Yeah!" Ann chimed in. "Boss sounds good."

"Boss it is, then." Sojiro was satisfied with that, and turned his head to look out the window as they drove. When they passed the first Shadow, he was taken aback.

"What is that?" he exclaimed as they went by it.

"That was a Shadow," Makoto explained. "They're monsters that lurk in the Metaverse. What we just saw wasn't its true form; it was just its 'shell,' in a sense. Their true forms are usually mythical creatures or deities that humans have created over the millennia."

" _Deities?_ You're running around with _gods_ down here?" Sojiro was incredulous.

"Oh, heavens, no," Yusuke corrected. "Merely personified forms of them. They are nowhere near as dangerous as the real things are made out to be in stories, although they are still a force to be reckoned with." Sojiro relaxed, but only slightly. The group continued the drive in silence for a while, the Shadows cowering away from them in fear. Eventually, they reached the next platform and piled out of the van. Sojiro looked at the downward-heading escalator in horror.

"There's more to this place? It took us long enough just to get here!"

"Ohhhh yeah," Futaba confirmed. "This place goes really deep. The farthest down we've gone is close to fifty floors now."

"Jeez," Sojiro breathed. "We're not going down that far, are we?"

"Definitely not," Akira said. "The Shadows get stronger the farther down we go. The ones you saw here don't dare come near us, but the ones in the deepest levels will attack us on sight."

"I'd prefer not to get attacked," Sojiro mused.

"We don't got much choice," Ryuji retorted. "That's kinda the whole reason we come here."

Sojiro's eyes widened. "Wait. Wait, wait wait wait. You fight these things? Willingly?" He did not like the sound of this anymore.

"We always go in prepared, and we're not helpless here by any means," Akira said quickly.

"Indeed. We are always becoming better fighters. I'd say we are quite seasoned warriors by now," Yusuke said confidently. "However, we always take care not to underestimate our foes. We learned that lesson very quickly." The others nodded in agreement.

"Don't you guys get hurt?" Sojiro asked, concern in his voice.

"Well, yes," Haru said, finally speaking up. "But never anything serious."

"No, you guys definitely get severely injured a lot," Futaba corrected her.

" _Oracle!_ " Ann hissed. Sojiro definitely did not like this anymore.

"What Noir _meant_ to say," Akira butted in, "was that we can heal virtually any injury we receive here with no lasting side effects."

"Oh, really? What, can you do magic here?" Sojiro's tone was dripping with sarcasm.

Everyone remained silent.

"...Oh my God. You can, can't you?"

"Let's move on," Akira said, and the group began to descend.

The trip proceeded rather uneventfully, except for the occasional stop by Akira to open a treasure chest. The Shadows avoided them for the first few floors, but at fifteen floors in, Akira began going out of his way not to encounter any.

"Is there a reason we're avoiding those...what were they called...Shadows, now?" Sojiro asked, nervous.

"These ones aren't dangerous, if that's what you're wondering," Akira assured him.

Ryuji grinned. "They're just too dumb to realize we'll kick their asses if they mess with us." The others nodded.

"It's a hassle to have to deal with them," Makoto elaborated. "It just wastes time that could be spent driving."

Sojiro nodded, and the rest of the drive was spent in silence, until they reached the middle section of Mementos. "Is it just me, or is this place starting to look a little...different?" he asked uncertainly.

"It's not just you," Futaba answered. "Like we said, it gets weirder the deeper you go. This isn't half as bad as the deepest part we've made it to."

"Fantastic," Sojiro remarked sarcastically. He was silent for a few moments and then spoke again. "Hey, I've been wondering. You guys never told me exactly what we were here to do."

"Oh, right. Glad you asked," Akira said. "I found out by working at the flower shop in Shibuya that someone has been going around and assaulting people in the area. We ID'ed him, and now we're on our way to his Shadow so that we can defeat it and change his heart."

" _His_ Shadow? Not like _those_ Shadows...?"

"It's kind of like those Shadows," Morgana cut in. "Everyone has a Shadow self in the Metaverse, a counterpart of them that represents their darker side. If a person becomes twisted enough, their distorted desires manifest as a Treasure in their Shadow in Mementos. We change hearts by subduing people's Shadows and taking their Treasures."

"Huh." Sojiro thought about that for a while. "...Is that all you guys do?"

"Oh, no. Mementos is where we go for the small fries," Ryuji said. "For the big targets, like Kamoshida or Madarame, they have their own Palaces outside Mementos. Those're a lot harder to deal with."

"It usually takes us several weeks to secure a Treasure for the more distorted targets," Makoto added. Suddenly, Morgana came to a halt.  
"We're here," he said.

Sojiro looked out the windshield and was greeted with a sight that made him distinctly uncomfortable. There was a big, swirling red vortex where a wall should have been. "Are we...going in there?"

Akira nodded. He floored the gas pedal, and they rocketed into the vortex. The entire world beyond the van went red, and the only thing that could be heard was the sound of an engine melded with Sojiro's terrified screams.


	2. Exit, Preferably Forever

Sojiro's yell of pure terror died out halfway through the crimson vortex, and morphed into a coughing fit, his years of cigarettes catching up with him at a very unfortunate moment. The coughing persisted for several seconds after the Monavan emerged, and Sojiro had to clear his throat when it finally stopped.

"We're here," Akira quipped flatly. Sojiro gave him a look.

"Are you alright, Boss?" Futaba asked fretfully. "Do you need a Donut-Worry?"

"I _need_ to not do that again," he answered, still rattled.

"Hate to break it to ya, Boss, but we're gonna have to do it again to get out of here," Ryuji said. Sojiro groaned.

"Anyway." Akira looked over his shoulder to face the rest of the group. "Does everyone remember the plan?" The Phantom Thieves nodded, and Sojiro sat with a bemused look on his face. "Alright. Pile out." Everyone got out of the Monavan, which proceeded to revert himself to just Mona, and came face to face with their target. Akira turned to look at Futaba. "Oracle, you know what to do." Futaba nodded and latched onto Sojiro's arm.

"Hold on, Boss!" she said, and then put her hand to her face. The futuristic goggles covering her eyes dissolved into spectral blue flames, and Necronomicon materialized around them. Futaba and Sojiro began to float within the UFO-shaped Persona, and it lifted them high into the air above where the imminent battle was going to take place.

"Whoa!" Sojiro exclaimed. "What...what is this?" He turned to look around the inside of Necronomicon. Surrounding them was...nothing. Sojiro stared off into the void, looking desperately for something, _anything_ that was solid. Suddenly, a large screen materialized directly in front of the two, giving them a view of the outside. Several smaller screens appeared around Futaba, as well as rings of glowing green hieroglyphs.

"This is Necronomicon," she answered. "It's my Persona. Pretty cool, huh?" A proud grin spread across her face, the same one she usually got when talking about the specs of a particular piece of hardware she liked. She pulled over a small screen which showed the exterior of Necronomicon as it hovered in the air above the rest of the Phantom Thieves.

"I...sure, it looks cool and all, but what _is_ a...Persona?"

"It's kinda like a Shadow," Futaba explained, "except it's not. It's a manifestation of the user's personality, or more specifically their rebellious spirit, I guess. Our Personas are what let us do magic." She grabbed one of the screens in front of her and pulled it closer, glancing over it. "Mine is a little different though. It doesn't have any offensive capabilities, but it has tons of tools for support, navigation, analysis, and stuff like that, so I do that instead of fighting."

"Huh...It does suit you, that's for sure." Sojiro had become acutely aware that he was levitating, and the feeling of weightlessness wasn't doing much to help the queasiness he was already feeling at the thought of those kids fighting... _monsters_. "Hey, uh...Is there a way I could have something to sit down on, maybe?"

"Uh-huh!" Futaba turned to her right and tapped away at a screen for a few moments, and an armchair as well as a floor appeared beneath Sojiro, and gravity began to function properly for him. A voice came in from a speaker that didn't appear to exist above the two, and Sojiro jumped.

"Oracle, are you ready?" It was Akira's voice.

"Ready when you are!" she answered. On the large screen, the Phantom Thieves came into view and confronted the Shadow waiting before them. They tried to reason with it, but it quickly became apparent that that was going to get them nowhere. Sojiro's eyes widened as the Shadow took its true form, and the fight began.

Akira's voice came in through the speaker again. "This thing looks familiar, got any data on it?"

A screen filled with images of strange creatures Sojiro didn't recognize came up in front of Futaba. She seemed to pull a copy of the image of the target's Shadow off the big screen, and placed it inside the smaller one in front of her. All of the creatures on screen vanished but one, and an entry for it came up. "Got it!" she confirmed. "Looks like a Kin-Ki. Should be weak to psychic attacks."

The battle did not last long. Sojiro watched in surprise as the kids more or less beat the thing senseless. It hardly ever had the time to get an attack in before it got knocked to the ground and the kids unloaded on it. Within minutes, they had beaten the Shadow into submission. It reverted back to its normal form, and Sojiro heard the kids talk to it briefly before it dissipated into light, and a small shining orb appeared in its place. Akira grabbed it, and then the Thieves regrouped by the red vortex that would take them back to Mementos proper. Futaba lowered Necronomicon and had it deposit herself and Sojiro on the ground before dismissing it.

"Well, that sure was something," Sojiro said. It was true. The kids had really surprised him; it seemed that they definitely knew their way around a fight...at least, when all of this supernatural stuff was involved. It was clear to him that they'd been doing this for a while.

"Is that all, Joker?" Makoto asked, turning to look at Akira. He nodded.

"That's all we came here for, I think," he said. "Is everyone ready to head back?" The rest of the Phantom Thieves nodded their assent, stretching to loosen up after the battle. "Alright then, let's go." Morgana poised himself to leap into the air and transform, but just as he was about to, a sound rang out, echoing through the small room. The Phantom Thieves froze, terror plastered over their faces, and Sojiro, due to an external force he couldn't identify, felt his blood run cold.

It was the sound of chains.

Before anyone else could react, Futaba had resummoned Necronomicon and gone airborne with Sojiro in tow. An instant later, the Reaper came through the vortex. Sojiro was only able to see the thing through the screen inside Necronomicon, but that didn't matter, because he could _feel_ its presence; the sheer malevolence it radiated sent shivers through his body, unearthing a deep-seated, primal fear in him that he was only vaguely consciously aware of.

The Reaper immediately raised one of its guns and fired it into the ceiling, unleashing Mabufudyne on the party. Ann was knocked prone, and the Reaper fired again, this time casting Megidola. The whole group cried out in pain, and Akira yelled "Oracle! Get us a way out of here!" before summoning Trumpeter and casting Debilitate on the Reaper. Morgana cast Mediarahan, Yusuke struck the Reaper with Deadly Fury, Ryuji charged up, Makoto cast Marakukaja, Haru fired a grenade at the Reaper, and Ann barely managed to pick herself up in time to take a defensive stance. Despite the sheer amount of force that Sojiro had just witnessed the group unload on the thing, it hardly seemed fazed.

"Hang in there, I can't find any openings yet! I'm gonna speed you guys up, just _don't get hit!_ " Futaba called, panic in her voice as she typed furiously at one of the screens in front of her.

The Reaper fired again, and Mahamaon enveloped the party, immediately striking down Ryuji and Haru. Akira used a Revival Bead on Ryuji, and Morgana desperately summoned Zorro and hit the Reaper square in the face with a Miracle Punch. The Reaper was stunned for just a moment, and in that moment, Futaba saw her chance. "Now! Grab Noir and run!" Yusuke grabbed Haru and hoisted her over his shoulder, and the group sprinted toward the vortex, Futaba and Sojiro close behind in Necronomicon.

They made it in just as the Reaper began to come to its senses, and when they emerged on the other side a few moments later, the vortex closed behind them. The group collapsed, partially from physical exertion and partially from stress. Morgana shakily got to his feet and made his way over to Haru and Yusuke, then casted Samarecarm on Haru. She gasped as life returned to her, and immediately shot to her feet. She looked around and, seeing no sign of the Reaper, sat back down and breathed a heavy sigh.

Akira spoke to Morgana urgently. "Mona, are you able to transform? We need to get moving quickly, before it shows up again." Morgana nodded, and unceremoniously _poofed_ into the Monavan. Necronomicon placed Sojiro and Futaba in the back and disappeared, and the rest of the Phantom Thieves began to climb in after them.

"What," Sojiro stammered, still trembling from the encounter, "was _that_." It wasn't a question, it was a demand.

"The Reaper," Akira answered quietly as he put Morgana in gear and began driving. "A Shadow...well, we think it's a Shadow." He paused. "It only ever appears if we stay stationary for a long time. Usually around two minutes." He entered a thoughtful silence, as if he was thinking of saying something, but whatever it was, he didn't voice it.

"That thing...it...it _killed_ -"

"Yes." Akira cut him off. The rest of the Phantom Thieves remained silent, partially out of discomfort and partially from exhaustion. The Reaper's very presence was draining, and it seemed to have an ever greater effect on them than it did on Sojiro, likely because they knew the full extent of its power. "It happens sometimes." The sentence was barely audible.

"It _happens?_ " Sojiro roared. "You mean to tell me you wander around here treating _death_ like it's an _occupational hazard?_ "

"Boss." Akira's tone was firm. "Think about it. This isn't the first time it's happened."

"What, is that supposed to make me feel better?" Sojiro was furious. All this time, they'd been going around this place getting injured and even _killed_ , and...

"Did you ever notice?" Akira asked. Sojiro's train of thought froze.

"I..."

"Did you ever pick up anything off about us? Ever see any injuries on me when I got home, or on them when they came to visit?"

"...No. I didn't." Sojiro was quiet. All this time, and he'd had no idea.

"Exactly." Akira was silent for a long, long few moments. "Dying _is_ an occupational hazard, but it's one we're always mindful of. We do what we do knowing full well what could happen to us, and we do everything we can to make sure we stay safe." Another brief pause. "The Reaper is something that we go to great lengths to not encounter. This is the second time it's ever happened. ...The first was more than enough to convince us to stay away from it." Sojiro thought he saw all of the Phantom Thieves shudder slightly.

"I...I really hate that you kids have to go through this," Sojiro muttered.

"We know," Futaba said, almost too quiet to hear. "That was part of why we didn't want you to find out."

"But it felt wrong to hide what we were doing from you," Akira explained. "The plan was to have you come with us while we dealt with one of our smaller targets, so that you'd at least have some idea what we were doing, but wouldn't be too worried about it."

"Heh. So much for that," Ryuji breathed. The Phantom Thieves' strength was slowly starting to return, and they began to sit up a little straighter.

Makoto spoke up. "The fact of the matter is, Boss...we can't stop what we're doing."

"Not yet," Yusuke agreed. "There is still much work to be done before we can retire as the Phantom Thieves."

"We hate to worry you," Haru said apologetically, "...but this is something we have to do."

Ann nodded. "People are counting on us."

Morgana's voice reverberated through the seats. "We have to be strong...for them."

"Okay, I get it, I get it," Sojiro chuckled, the faintest trace of a smile crossing his face. "Jeez, you don't have to give me a speech..." He thought to himself for a long while. These kids really were special.

"Oh, and, just so we're clear, by the way," he said, his expression turning back to a scowl, "I'm never coming back here again." Everyone laughed at that, and the rest of the drive back home was made in comfortable silence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had the whole group participate in the fight because honestly, when everyone's present and you're facing the fucking Reaper there's no reason to only have four people doing the fighting while the rest sit back and watch them get their asses beat.
> 
> I have feelings about the Reaper. They're not positive feelings.

**Author's Note:**

> Poor Sojiro.


End file.
